Twerkology 101: How I Learned To Twerk In 3-Minutes


True life: I’m naturally rhythmless. Unlike most gays in the club, I don’t turn into Ciara when I hit the dance floor. There is  no back bending, squatting, or even trying to make my derrière clap. I’ve tried and failed, often causing myself and anyone I decide to back it up against embarrassment. It’s quite sad, really. Most gays and girls expect you to turn into a Cirque de Soleil performer when a Juicy J song comes on at a party.

Instead, I resemble a discombobulate Sims character flailing my arms in the air.. All that’s missing is an emerald diamond above my head. I’ve been doing this since I was 11, at my first middle school dance, and at 26 it’s intolerable. I refuse to close out my 20’s not knowing how to do a dance trend well.

A few days ago, I was trolling Facebook and saw a status with a video attached that a fellow blogger friend of mine posted. The status read: “This video is SO ratchet, but I learned to twerk in 3 minutes!” Twerk? In three minutes? No way! The exclamation point at the end of her status sold me. Can my rhythmically-challenged self learn this dance? Will I be able to “twerk” successfully after viewing this?

To clarify, twerking is the shaking of the hips and bottom in a twist/ jerk like fashion. Although, there’s no clear origin on how twerking came about, in 2005, a pair of young African American women from Atlanta, GA, uploaded videos on Youtube, “twerking” to popular hip-hop and down south club music. The women were dubbed the “Twerk Team” for their expert knowledge of the dance.

In recent years, “twerking” has started a cult following and even is name-dropped in a few club hits. On the 2011 song, “Round of Applause,” ATL rapper Waka Flocka Flame and Drake solicit a woman to “bounce that ass, shake that ass like the Twerk Team In a more subtle way, rapper French Montana asks “what you twerkin’ with?” on his hit, “Pop That.” Fellow ATL rapper, Lady (real name Shameka Brown) provides a female perspective to twerking in her song, aptly titled “Twerk.” With lyrics such as “he like it when I make that ass vibrate (twerk),” Lady uses the power of her twerk to command the boys in her yard, or in this case, the dance floor. Furthermore, she drops the word a whopping 75 times in the song.

It has even trickled down to modern slanguage. For example, I use the word “twerk” in every day vernacular, aside from its gyrating connotation. I use it as a verb: “Naw, I’m not twerking with that. (Translation: I’m not going to do that. It doesn’t sit well with me). Or as an adjective, “She’s walking twerkingly!” (Translation: There’s an extra pep in her step!) In many cases, I use it as a noun and say simply: “I’m going to twerk tonight!” (Translation: I’m going to have a good time this evening).

  • Kmo

    He like it when I make that ass vibrate! TWERK.

  • Ayreal

    Let me see what you’re twerkin wit

  • http://www.facebook.com/ZionMarQuiese.Devereaux Zion MarQuiese Devereaux

    No grown man should be doing this.

  • http://twitter.com/RonaldMatters RONALDMATTERS.com

    This is Freaknik ’96 all over again!

  • http://bamaboiblues.blogspot.com/ Bama B.

    The first 15 seconds gave me all I needed. Pure joy!

  • BlackPegasus

    Why is this trash on a site for Male readers?

    Oh wait… I already know. SMH

    • fshfdjh

      Because men twerk. DUH.

      • Emily

        Men shouldn’t twerk.

        End of story.

        It’s fine if you’re gay but don’t twerk. Sexuality doesn’t justify behavior attributed to women.

        • T

          Posting your ‘right’ opinion doesn’t justify being an asshole and gender stereotyping

  • spydra

    “She’s got an extra pep in her step.” LOL, that’s some funny bidness — thanks!

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  • http://thestateofwest.blogspot.com/ reggiewest

    I think if her ass was a LIL bit bigger, I would have been a tad bit more interested.

    • haha

      loooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooool

  • mindless

    i still cant twerk.

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  • OH GOD FML

    No no no no no OH GOD NO!

  • IMBAD

    HELLR

  • Emily

    Men shouldn’t twerk. Gay, bi or straight, men shouldn’t twerk.

    Period.

    • lol

      tru

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  • Braven Skittles-cookie Burris-

    I’m a gay black man from Texas. I been testing since I was 3. I really mean that. My parents have the video to prove it. And no I didn’t have a father that wasn’t around. I learn from my aunts and peers. We had little Nursery Rhymes. Like sally walker chin chin bang bang. We took that and what we learn from others and just did it. My first song i Reambe twerking to is juvinaile back that ass up. Im 20 years old and i can do it better then most girls. It helps that i have my mothers ass and her flexabilty. Shit i make ciara look like a newbe. Its something that i love its something im really good at. I spent hours in front of the mirror like others girls practising. It took a lot of work.

  • Molly

    penis in the mouth

  • anonymos

    i am in middle school and this helps so much with my Miely Cyrus Halloween costume

  • Lulu G.

    Cuz u gotta squat witta arched back and TWERK TWERK TWERK IT UPPP

  • Twerk

    I am gay n I wanna learn this to twerk to my bf!

  • Andy

    Twerking was around since before it was called twerking. It all falls under the category of Bootyshaking. Check out Uncle Luke and Patra to see just how far it goes. Old news, new name.

  • Mashdemdwn

    Men have been tweaking before it was called tweaking. Chick out the No Good But So Good Boys uncle Luke toured with. Or a song called Throw that D*.